


where do we go from here

by ciminos



Category: Love Victor (TV 2020)
Genre: 1x07, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Benjamin "Benji" Cambell, Canon Compliant, Episode: s01e07 What happens in Willacoochee, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Internalized Homophobia, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Missing Scene, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, Victor Salazar - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:20:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25378315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ciminos/pseuds/ciminos
Summary: Victor comes back to the hotel room and maybe he wakes up in Benji's arms.
Relationships: Benjamin "Benji" Campbell/Victor Salazar
Comments: 7
Kudos: 120





	where do we go from here

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I've ever published I know it's not very good but please don't bully me !

Time passes uncomfortably slow as Victor continues to mull over his thoughts and emotions out in the hallway. He kissed Benji. Benji. The guy he had unwillingly dreamed of kissing since his first day of school. Except it wasn’t the perfect fairytale kiss he had imagined, but rather a complete disaster. What was he even thinking? The truth is, he wasn’t thinking. He didn’t think at all about how Benji would feel, or if he even liked him that way.

Normally he wasn’t one to act without thinking, but being in the same bed with Benji and seeing him lie there, it was pretty much impossible to think about anything other than grabbing him by the face and kissing him until his lips felt numb. 

Why does he have to be…that way. Life would be so much easier if he could just feel the same way for Mia as he does for Benji. Benji, who’s already in love with someone else. Benji, who pushed him away- who probably hates him now.

Eventually Victor calms down enough to be able to stand back up. He contemplates heading down to the lobby and booking a separate room for himself but decides against it as its already late in the night and they would be leaving early the next day anyway.

Victor slowly opens the door in an attempt to be quiet but trips over himself as he walks in.  
“Shit.” he hisses. Benji sits up from his spot in bed and turns towards Victor.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.” Victor whispers as he steadies himself.

“It’s fine, I wasn’t sleeping anyway.” Benji replies emotionless before turning back over and pulling the covers up high passed his shoulders. Victor makes his way over to the bed and grabs a pillow.

“Are you going somewhere?” Benji asks as he hears Victor moving around the room, but doesn’t turn around to face him.

“I was going to lay down here on the ground” Victor replies awkwardly, “but if you want me to leave i’ll go get another-“ Victor is cut off by Benji.

“It’s fine, just sleep on the bed. I’m not going to make you sleep on that dirty floor.” Benji replies.

Does Benji expect Victor to act like the whole thing never happened? As much as he’d wish nothing more for things to go back to normal, he couldn’t help but think about it. He couldn’t stop thinking about the way Benji’s lips taste, the way he could feel his body heat as the kiss deepened, even if it was just a few seconds. 

Kissing Benji just felt right. He finally knew what Simon meant when he said kissing Bram felt like more than just a kiss, not only could he feel it on his lips, but his whole body coursed with that feeling that kissing Mia could never bring. That feeling of warmth, of love, of passion.

“Benji, can we talk,’ Victor whispered to no response. “Benji.”  
“Victor, no.” Benji replies coldly. Victor has never heard Benji speak so deeply and it startles him.

“I’m sorry okay, It was a mistake.” Victor says with his words but doesn’t feel in his heart. It didn’t feel like a mistake. Being with Benji felt like destiny. Like they were meant to be together. Maybe Victor does believe in destiny. Maybe those shoes his mom found at that garage sale were destiny, and maybe Benji was his destiny too. 

“Victor, I don’t want to talk about it, let’s just sleep,” Benji speaks in a blunt but soft tone, “tomorrow we’ll go pick up the machine first thing in the morning and drive back.”

Victor replies with a slow nod, despite Benji still facing away from him, as he get’s under the covers and lays flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling. 

It’s silent for a few minutes and Victor starts to wonder if Benji had fallen asleep when thunder booms and makes Victor jump.

Victor swears he hears a small laugh come from Benji as he calms himself down.

“Are you laughing at me?” Victor asks, he attempted to sound serious but couldn’t help the small chuckle escape from his mouth as well.

“Oh no,” Benji teases as he turns over onto his back. “I would never do that.”  
Even in the dimly lit room Victor can see Benji’s smile and can’t help but smile himself.

“It was loud okay I wasn’t expecting it,” Victor defends as he tilts his head to face Benji, “I’m surprised it didn’t scare you.”

“After spending 2 hours in that outlet mall with Sarah, nothing scares me anymore.” Benji laughs at his own joke.

Although Benji isn’t looking at him, Victor can feel the happiness in his voice. He wishes he could freeze time here in bed with Benji, who’s smiling and makes him feel like maybe he does deserve a great love story just like Simon. But he knows that he can’t. He knows that Benji already has someone that gets to look at him everyday, kiss him as much as he wants, and be with him every second.

Maybe Victor will have someone like that one day. But the truth is he doesn’t want that person to be anyone else. He wants to be able to come home to Benji and tell him he loves him and let him know that he is everything he ever wanted. He wants to be able to go to bed every night with Benji there, and give him the warmth and love that he deserves.

Victor doesn’t notice when Benji turns to face him. He doesn’t notice when Benji’s eyes start to drift close and his breathing starts to slow. And he certainly doesn’t notice the cute look on Benji’s face as he sleeps. How peaceful and calm he looks. He looks completely different from the look he wore after Victor kissed him. Before he looked scared and confused, but now here he looks like it never even happened. 

Victor doesn’t fall asleep for a long time, but when he does maybe he imagines Benji moving closer and resting his head on Victor’s shoulder. 

**

Victor wakes up to the sun from the window behind the bed as it lights up the room. He wonders what time it is but as he moves to check his phone he notices a certain weight pressed against his side.

He looks down and sees Benji. His own arm is around Benji’s back and Benji has his arm laid on top of Victor’s chest, eyes still closed. Part of him wonders if he’s still dreaming. He doesn’t dare to move as he takes in the position they're in. 

It’s not fair that Derek probably gets to wake up to this sight every day. Victor hopes Derek knows how lucky he is because he would kill to be able to see Benji first thing in the morning. To be able to wake up next to someone as sweet, kind, and patient as him. He knows that nobody will ever come close to making him feel the same way Benji does. And that frightens him. Victor pushes those thoughts out of his head and lets himself fall back asleep as he listens to the breath of the sleeping boy next to him.


End file.
